YouTube Foolishness: Run Tell Dat Edition

No words necessary.....



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Someone please call 9-1-1.................

I don't know if I've shared this with ya'll before (something tells me I have but I can't remember) but the local paper where I live has a police beat section. I usually read this daily due to the rise in crime (especially home burglaries) that have been occurring lately in this once oh so quiet town. So far, our neighborhood (and surrounding one's) has fared quite well. Everyone on our street gets along pretty well. We may not have close relationships with each other but we always speak and wave to each other as we pass down the street.

Anyway, so back to the paper. Like I said, this section keeps me up to date on crime and what not but sometimes there is something that makes me crack the hell up laughing catches me completely off guard. Take for example this little gem of a report:

Battery at 1155 Skyline Dr. (Walmart). Officers responded to a possible fight Thursday inside Walmart. The victim stated that she was in the checkout aisle with two friends and her sister. The victim said the man in front of them asked them a question. She thought he asked if they would like to go in front of him in line, and the victim responded, “yes.” The suspect became angry and told the victim he was going to “choke slam” her. The suspect allegedly punched the victim twice in the face. The pair were separated until officers arrived. The suspect told authorities that he was a secret agent and that it was illegal for someone to eavesdrop on his conversations. The suspect stated that he was having a conversation with someone in his head. When the suspect caught the victim listening to his conversation, he asked her if she was eavesdropping and she said, “yes.” The suspect said the voice told her that she had committed a crime and needed “to be dealt with.” The suspect was transported to the Faulkner County Detention Center.

This reminds me of a run-in I had with a crazy at that very same Wal...Mart back when I worked there during college. There was only one in town then and now we have two....ooooooooooooooo!!! Anyway, I was on lunch and decided to hit up the McD's in the back of the store for some food. After placing my order, I noticed this loud lady acting a fool pointing at random people screaming at them. Me being me, I just looked at her and rolled my eyes. Crazy lady notices me and proceeds to come my way. Awwwwwwwwww hell!!! I instantly started cussin' myself in my head for not looking the other way. I grab my car keys out of my pocket and position them between my middle and ring fingers just in case I had to stab a hoe defend myself. She was almost thisclose to me when sakurity came and saved my ass. LOL

I don't know why I didn't just leave. I suspect it had a lot to do with the fact that I was hungry.....and immature. At any rate, I learned my lesson.

And now for a musical selection...............................

Name that baby!!!!

OMG, I'm so hating blogger right now. Please excuse the janky font and spacing.

The local news station I watch in the morning loves to interact with their viewers via FB. Quite honestly, I think the morning team has one of the cushiest jobs ever. With only having to do a few interviews, a little weather, read the previous night’s news on the teleprompter and comments to questions they post on FB each day for a couple of hours, I’d say they’ve got it made.

One of the reporters on the show is pregnant with twins and is scheduled to give birth sometime today. So of course the FB topic today centers around babies, more specifically baby names.

Good morning! In honor of _________ set to give birth later today we are talking about baby names. A list of fastest rising baby names in America was just released. Tune into to To.da.y.s T-H--V This Morning at 5:40 to see what they are and we want to know the most unusual name you've ever heard. Do you have a child with an unusual name?

This topic piqued my interest as I had a love\hate (mostly hate) relationship with my uncommon name growing up. I used to curse my mom silently in my head (especially during my tween/early teen years) for giving me such an unusual name. The kids, with their mean asses, teased me mercifully. “Hey Woolite!”, they would say. (Go ahead and laugh.) “Why couldn’t she have named me Nicole, Melissa, Sarah, or Elizabeth?”, I asked. Hell, I would have been happy with Ann (or so I thought). Then I found out why she named me what she did. For those of you not in the know or that may not remember, my father passed away in a car accident right down the street from our house while my mom was pregnant with me. I found out later in life that she, not surprisingly, almost miscarried me. In order to honor my father, she decided to name me after him. Because there was no way of determining my sex (that I know of anyway) it was decided if I were a boy I would be a Jr. (of course) if I were a girl (insert my real name here).

Luckily, time has a way of sorting these things out. Even though my mom got the idea of my first name from a street sign in Memphis (no lie), I’ve grown to love it and wouldn’t trade it for anything in the world. Some of the names on the list however? Not so much.

Here are some the unusual names and comments on the post that stood out to me:

Statia

Zing Lee

Typhne...(Tiff-nee not Tiffany) Their words not mine.

Christmas Snow

Iwon (this one made me crack up laughing)

Lexus Mercedes (her last name was also a car) Again, their words not mine. I’m going to go out on a limb and guess her last name is Ford. How dreadful.

Shanda Leir

Arieah Ozma Kaylieth

My great aunt was named Dewdrop. She married a man with the last name Snowball. So she was Dewdrop Snowball!

i went to school with a girl named Whiskey

I once new a girl named Merry Christmas

I know this family. Disney Land has a little brother named Ty Land. Sweet kiddos

I have a uncle named Theron, and a cousin named Booger, for real........

here is list for you of live children and I still can't believe their parent named them this: maryjuana
Conception
Hennesy
Fiancé
Chavoka

I’m not going to ask you to name any of the most unusual names you’ve ever heard but if the spirit moves you then so be it.

And now for a musical selection...............

I suck...............

So BBA numbers two and three made an impromptu visit with Granny (my mom) yesterday. The plan was for me to take my mom's car to the airport (she left it at the house so she wouldn't have to pay for parking) and they would ride out to Memphis. After speaking with her yesterday afternoon before the plane took off, I pretty much knew they would be staying the night. Apparently getting through security with two small children was enough to tire her out. Hell it would probably tire me out too.

After returning to the house, I got the kids fed and took them over to the school next door so they could play and run off some of their energy and excitement from seeing me the dogs. About 20 minutes in, BBA number three showed signs of extreme crankiness and crying. Now I don't know nothing about birthin' or raisin' no babies but I do know what that means in Mommyland. NAP/BEDTIME!! I told his big brother (BBA number two) he had about ten more minutes and we were heading back to the house. BBA number three's cries were getting louder (and quite honestly more embarrassing). Thank goodness only a few people were out there with us. Then, he wanted his mommy. Being the good Auntie I am, I pulled out my phone and called her. After listening to their conversation on speakerphone, it was pretty obvious that my big sister was more interested in her nap than her spawn's need for her. Imagine that! LOL

BBA number two headed over to the another piece of play equipment to enjoy the last few minutes and surprisingly BBA number three followed. I walked over to join them and BBA number three announces "I SUCK".

Me: No you don't. What would make you say that?

BBA number three: Aunt AR Gal, I suuuuuuuuuuck

Me: *thinking what the hell*

BBA number two: He's saying he's sick

Me: Really? How the h..... thanks for telling me.

Sooooooooooo, I go and ask him where it hurts and he points to his belly.

Me: Do you have to boo boo?

BBA number three: Yes I have to boo boo

Me: Okay, we're leaving now.

He then proceeds to hurl chunks of the dinner and ice cream he had eaten.

Me: *screaming on the inside* BBA number two, let's go.

Annnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnd he hurls again with bigger chunks.

Me: *turning his body the opposite way while secretly praying, please don't get it on me, please don't get it on me, please don't get it on meeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee*

Nothing on this planet is as gross to me than seeing someone throw up. I mean really, it's disgusting.

After Vomitgate, we haul ass back to the house. I want to pick him but (1) he's heavy and (2) I really don't want this kid blowing chunks down my back or worse...in my hair! I started to call Mistah but then thought better of it. What if he does it in the car? OMG, ew. Good thing we only live less than a quarter of a mile from the school. Once we got close enough, I put my big girl panties on and picked him up but not after asking five times if he had to throw up any more.

We made it back to the house without any further incident and BBA number two and three were promptly given a bath and put.to.bed.

If this is a preview of what's to come, I'm in trouble.

Update on the update and other shenanigans.........

Sooooooooo, I still haven't decided what kind of car I want (thanks for all your suggestions). I don't think I will truly start narrowing down my imaginary list until I get the check. Speaking of, turns out I don't own a dime on the car and got money back. The lien folks said it was because of finance charges and the warranty I purchased. They don't disclose this information unless your car is totaled. Ain't that a blip?! At any rate, I'm not complaining. I'm rejoicing!

I ended up having to go to the doc for back and neck pain. It's nothing major. The human body is amazing....that's all I know.

Mom, drove in Saturday for me to take her to the airport. She'll return with the boys Saturday and they'll head back to Memphis. Even if I haven't purchased a car by the time they are scheduled to come down getting a rental won't be a big deal now. YAY!

Ummmmmmmm, let's see what else. My boss's last day is this Friday. Ya'll already that but I felt it needed repeating. LOL

I didn't get the other job. No worries. Did I tell ya'll I was sitting up in that interview sweating like a banshee??!! LOL

What else? Nothing. That's it.

Friends, Romans, countrymen, bloggers lend me your eyes.....................

It's a done deal. I'm getting another car.

Let the official car search phuckery begin.

In the spirit of this journey I'm on let's make this fun. I want any and all car suggestions from you BUT there are a few stipulations.

• Four door vehicles only
• No drop tops
• Price....hmmmmmmmm do I want to limit the price. Yeah I do. Nothing over $20K.
• No humongous SUV's. Tires on those sap suckas are expensive!
  

Those are the basics. Once everything is said and done regarding the claim, we are going to try and make this process as quick and painless as possible. I'm ready to get back to my type of normal life.

Oh and if anyone mentions a pre-owned Pinto like Mistah did............................



And now for a musical selection

TOTALED (UPDATE)

So now I'm considering not accepting the total loss and just getting the thing fixed. My car is a bit older but I like it and it's mine......shitshoot. If I may be quite honest, I truly have issues with them taking ownership of it and benefiting (from the sale of the vehicle through salvage) from MY loss. I've paid money a good amount of money on it (and still owe just a bit). The more I digest and process my options, the more totaling it seems like I'd just be throwing money out of the window. That along with everything that comes with the car search process is really swaying my thoughts. We did a little parking lot window shopping Monday afternoon and OMG I got SO annoyed with the salesmen. I know they are just doing their job but when I say I'm just looking or I'm not buying a car today, my naive mind really expects them to respect that.

Anyway, the initial conversation with the folks at the repair shop stated that there is no structural damage to the vehicle just cosmetic. Now I just need to have another conversation with them verify that and with the insurance folks (both theirs and mind) about some other odds and ends. *sigh*

Emma just came to give me a kiss on the arm. I guess she senses my stress level is high and/or that I need to get some rest.

The journey continues...................................................

TOTALED....

Sooooo, the car is totaled. To say I'm in a phucked up mood is an understatement. I thought the car was going to be repaired until the other folks insurance company went to look at it and deemed it totaled. Granted I could still opt to have it repaired but that would be a whole 'nuther hassle with my car insurance making sure they would still insure it with complete coverage (not just liability).

We have a rental (for a little while longer) plus the other car but this has put a total wrench into future plans. Specifically when the boys come in August. Who knows if I'll even have another freaking car by then. Once the rental is gone, Mistah will still need it to go back and forth to work while the boys are here. What are the kids and I supposed to do? Play hide and seek until he comes back? *sigh* I could pay for a rental that week but guess what? I don't want to. They should have to pay but this bitch of a claims agent isn't budging.

I never knew the process of dealing with insurance companies could be so damn frustrating and stressful. You would think that since this wasn't my fault they would be kissing my ass. HA!

NOT!!!!!!!!!!!!!

The journey continues...............