YouTube Foolishness: Negro Food Network Edition

I actually have a little spare time to post today. What better than with a taste of YouTube Foolishness?!

This fool had the nerve to disable embedding so please Click here

HAPPY V-DAY KIDDOS!

She got a pocket full of stones......................

but they done left her ass alone.

Picture it. January 31, 2011 at the revenue office (the DMV for all you northern folk). I'm waiting in line to renew my license plate tags for a second time mind you.

Sidenote: I have got to do a better job of (1) not waiting until the last minute to do this and (2) making sure the car is assessed BEFORE I renew......especially when the reminder they send in the mail has a big fat NO next to the question has the vehicle been assessed. *sigh*

Okay, so I'm waiting in line but I had seen this delicious beast outside while in my car holding with the property tax folks to work their magic. I only caught a quick glance but I remember my first thought being, 'Ew'.

Once I make it back inside and am standing behind her, my next thought is 'why'? And that I need to take a picture. Thank goodness the line was moving slow.

No really. Why? Anything you can think of just why.

She (yes it was really a lady) exuded all kinds of confidence but damn that body.....

As a fellow member of the flat booty committee, I'm offended.

And now for a musical selection to help ease your soul.......................

RHOA Finale Recap.........................

Head on over to Kelly's spot to get your recap fix!!! I have so many thoughts about last night's finale but I don't have time to type it out. *shakes fist at the man and his demands* I will say I had THE best time reading posts on FB while watching. Speaking of a good time......why did Mistah watch the finale with me. Actually, he watched damn near the entire marathon yesterday. And yes, it was only because there were no NFL games on yesterday.

Me: It's okay baby, you can go ahead and admit it. You're addicted.

Mistah: I wouldn't say that.....they just make it so interesting that I can't stop watching.

Me: Oh okay but you do know that's just another way of saying that you're addicted right.

Mistah: I'm not addicted.

Me: Oh okay.

CTHU!!!! He just wouldn't admit it. I think he got kinda mad because I wouldn't stop laughing at him. To be fair, I was laughing at him AAAAAAAANNNND the show.

I swear dude had me in stitches during the entire finale but the joke he cracked about Peter's mama??!! He said she looked like she just rose from the dead like a zombie in the Thriller video.

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But really though.....where were her teefus?

Ok, let me get back to work. Well first I need to visit the ladies to see why my chest is tingling. I hope it's not my lactating breasts otherwise I've got a whole 'nother set of problems.

Holla!

(Semi) YouTube Foolishness: Matrimony Edition

This can only be categorized as some ho shit......but I'm still over here LMAO!

Sorry I tried embedding the player but the link doesn't work. :(

Chillin...........

On day two of inclement weather leave from work..........

The only snow I see is in the grass and roofs...........

Streets look clear.....................

I'm not tripping though.....I take free days anyway I can.........

Next up.....MLK Day...............

Sick.......sore throat...........bad cough...............

It's worse in the morning when I wake up.........................

I have a dentist appointment Thursday. Should I cancel?.................

I really don't want to but it's probably the courteous thing to do..............

I've been trying to knock this crud out with my combo of hot toddy's\hot liquids in general(including soup)\med's...........

Seems to be working.........................

Watched Twilight:New Moon on Skinamax this past weekend.....................

Snoozefest.......................................

Ready for the premiere of The Game.........................

I wonder if they will be able to cuss like they did on The CW Network. BET likes to bleep that out so I doubt it......................

I'm an admitted reality court show addict........

No, I don't need help.........................

Can't wait for Maury......hope it's paternity test day........................

I've seen this commercial no less than 10 times today.....................

Gooooooooooood Morning Vietnam!!!

I'm working on a whopping four hours of sleep this morning. And here I thought waking up was going to be the challenge after being off all this time. As if! I planned on getting a full eight hours or at least really, really, really close to it. I spent half of that time up wide awake partially due to a pounding headache. Once I realized my head would not stop hurting, I threw the covers off angrily and took some med's.

Still....no sleep or relief.

Hmmmmm, maybe sitting up will stop the blood from rushing to my head and alleviate my pain. I'm no WebMD but it did help some. I was still bright eyed and Emma was quite bushy tailed that she got to sleep in my lap while I channel surfed. The OWN Network looks like it may be interesting but I thought that damn show with Doctors Oz and Phil and Suze would never end.

How could someone not know that magnesium helps move your bowels? I grew up in a household where Milk of Magnesia was the norm so it's second nature to me. How could you go five days and not poop? Seems like a person would explode or at the very least become really ill. I guess not. I hope that one chick has a BM soon.

I don't think the 52 year old virgin lady will ever get any. I wonder if she has dildos. Would she still be considered a virgin if she uses one but never has sex with a man?

My brain can be both weird and raunchy.

Some relief....still no sleep so I decided to take a bath. That always helps soothe me especially close to midnight. *sigh*

It worked. I'm all ready to go. Problem is, so was Mistah. All my tossin' and turnin' kept him from sleeping peacefully. What's a girl to do? Lift a leg....it's the least I could do.

Don't feel too sorry for him. He busted one annnnnnnnnnnnnd realized (at the very last minute) that he was off today too.

Bastid.

Happy New Year!

Sorry I missed wishing you guys a Merry Christmas so Merry (belated) Christmas. Yeah that sounded sincere. LOL We've been off work since the 23rd and have been in quite the slumber during our love week at Chateau De Lazee'. Outside of visiting the family, doing a little shopping to catch some post holiday deals and celebrating Mistah's b-day we've been in the house most of the time (hunchin'). #welivetheglamorouslife

#freakythatwasforyou

Annnnnnnnywaaaaaay, I hope the holiday season was great for you all and that the upcoming new year is pregnant with promise.......if you're lucky with twins!!

xoxo!!!

And now for the last musical selection of 2010...................

YouTube Foolishness: Men with No Life Edition

Seriously? Y'all ain't ready. Giggles, goofaws, snickers, chuckles or as in my case hollers will ensue.




Sidenote: I just recently found out that this song is sung by a grown ass man. o_O

I'm in lurve!

I was so nervous about the install, specifically the service person's ability to show up on time....if at all. You guys know the deal especially when given the dreaded appointment slot time frame. Well ours was from 9-11 am and I'm happy to report he made it here right before ten. So far, we are thoroughly impressed with what U-Verse has to offer. The service has so many wonderful, wonderful, WONDERFUL features! Wanna know what I'm most excited about? The health and fitness on demand option. I'll never have to buy another fitness DVD ever again!!

Freaky, Barista and Southern were correct, it's great! Needless to say, I highly recommend it as well. If you ain't got it.....GET IT!!!!


And now for a musical selection...........................

A little bit of this, a little bit of that....................

• I'm watching the Mariah Carey (aka Freaky D's future baby mama) Christmas special. The only thing I keep thinking is why must she insist on wearing those too short dresses. When I say her 'fits are barely grazing the surface..........

• The j-o-b gave us a free half day this past Friday. Part of that time was lunch catered by the cafe (run by Ar.a.ma.rk) next door. It wasn't mandatory that we attend. I didn't. I haven't eaten there (or the food they prepare) since I received a not so pleasant lunch entree' and also confirmation that one of the cooks (who I already gave the side-eye to) was way past unsanitary. I'll pass on the nutsack sammies TYVM!
  

• A co-worker and I opted to go eat at our favorite restaurant in the River Market The Flying Fish.

• I had to take the car in for some work so she and another co-worker (that joined us after the our respective lunches) followed me to drop my car off and we went to the movies to see....get this. Burlesque. Bwahahahahahahahahaha It's definitely not the type of movie I would have chosen BUT we were looking to do something and one of us (not I) loves those types of films so there ya go. All in all, it wasn't that bad. Not the greatest movie but entertaining nonetheless.
  

• I want to watch "The Nutcracker" really bad. Hopefully it will be on soon.

• Mistah and I upgraded our cells this weekend. A BB Torch for me and a newer iPhone for him. I'm still trying to get used to the touchscreen. Thank goodness it has the qwerty keyboard for transitioning folk like me.
  

• Wow, Mariah's mom has a beautiful voice. It sounds like she was classically trained in opera.

• We are making the jump to AT&T U-Verse this weekend. Anyone know anything about their service? Should we call and cancel before they come to do the install? No really, should we? The main thing guiding our decision is that for the money we pay now, we will get TONS more stuff (in addition to what we already have) including TV One (which I only get to watch while I'm in Memphis) and bookoos of sports crap for Mistah. Oh and yes MrsTDJ, a DVR. LOL I think we are probably one of the few people in the country that has survived without one. I still don't think I'll use it much but hey only time will tell.
  

• I'm black and I love cold weather!!! LOVE.IT! Well, except when it's really windy or when its so cold\icy the power goes out. Even I admit that sucks.

• I also love Tabitha's (on Salon Takeover) haircut. It is most bad ass. Anyone watching? I know the format of the show is pretty much the same each week but her ability to rip assholes effectively is really impressive. Did you all see last week's episode with those folks living in that nasty, junky house? UGH! I don't see how she slept on that couch!!!

• Who watched the Real Houseslores of ATL last night? Have you drawn up your friend contracts yet? I'm almost finished with my first batch.

• What about 16 & Preggers? The most interesting episode this season by far has been Christina's story. Did y'all hear about her husband's family threatening to sue MTV for defamation? *chuckles*

• Oh yeah, annnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnd there will be a Teen Mom 2. If the original Teen Mom ends, I hope they at least do a finale season. I need closure!!!
  

• The token crazy bitch on my team has been identified and it only took her three weeks to show her true colors. Throwing temper tantrums and storming out of meetings does not a professional make and that's all I gotsta say about that.
  

• I almost bought my first Christmas present this weekend. I was going to pick up a copy of 'Despicable Me' for the boys. I looked all over the electronics department for that DVD. Figuring it was sold out, I asked one of the cashiers....ya know just to confirm. The thing doesn't come out until Tuesday. *sigh*

• If you've never seen Black Dynamite, please do yourself a favor and go rent or buy it. In the words of Barista, best.shit.ever.
  

• Ummmm, what else? Nothing. I'm out.

And now for a musical selection.................................

TIREd

In all my days, I have never had as many issues with tires on a vehicle as I have in the past 30 days. Flats, screws\other miscellaneous objects, tire patches\new tire....OH MY!

I'm sick of this shit.

And now for a musical selection.....

ELECTION 2010 - YOU DECIDE (AGAIN)..........

Yes I know (most) elections over but in AR Gal's world, it ain't over until the fat lady (with ginormous boobs that hang to her belly button and wears no bra at my job) sings. I don't hear her yet so here we go.

Is this appropriate interview attire? Press 1 for yes OR 2 for no.


I had to come back and add some thoughts. Maybe it's just my style (which apparently is a lot simpler) but this seems a bit extra....especially for a job interview. Well, unless it's for a job at Sears or something, which it's not. I haven't worn a pure red suit (with shiny gold buttons (the ones featured are leopard print to match the ensemble TYVM) since my high school graduation pictures. No worries, you will NOT be seeing any pic's of that massacre. In her defense, I've heard red is a power color but do we really need this much strength?

Please note, this ain't me....DUH!

And now a musical selection while you cast your votes...........


Kanye West - Power (Official Video) found on R&B

Oh Southern Gaaaaaaaal........

Yes this picture was take while crouching down on the restroom floor (on my knees only TYVM).

ENJOY!!!

And now for a break........

Kids, work is kicking my ass right now but I'm (ironically) loving the new challenges. We'll see how long this new job work glow lasts. LOL


xoxo,

A natural born pessimist

And now for a musical selection.................

I know I'm probably late...........

as some of you have probably either heard or seen of this show before but Scare Tactics on the SyFy network is the best thing since sliced bread. Mistah and I sat and watched three plus mindless hours of it. I kept delaying my need for a shower and he even skipped Monday Night Football because it was just that funny. I will have to make a mental note to watch this next week because it's a keeper!

Here's a clip of one of the jokes played-one of the best ones in my opinion.

I whip my beads back and forth......................

Well folks, I done seen it all....and I mean ALL!!! If you'll recall in this post, I shared with you some of the work attire dawned by one of the temps. I'm here to tell you Space Jam Jordans ain't got shit on the new chick in town.


The picture is fuzzy so I'll assist. Ladies and gents, in essence, this is what you see.

THIS BROAD HAS BEADS IN HER HAIR!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

BEAAAAAAAAAAAAADDDDDDDDDDS IIIIIIIIIIIIIIIN HEEEEEEEEEEEEEER HAAAAAAAAAAAAIIIIIIIIIR!!!!!!!!!!!

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAATTTTTT WOOOOOOOOOORRRRRRRRRRRRRRRKKKKKK!!!!!!!!

Oh and Beady Bee wasn't nice enough to get the clear ones. Her head is chock FULL of a cornucopia of colors like she just tasted the damn rainbow!!!

RED......................YELLOW.......................BLUE........................GREEN............

I was so dumbfounded when I saw this mess that I had to look at the girl thrice to make sure it wasn't someone's child. No such luck. I was lucky enough, however, to have my trusty phone on hand to capture this moment in time because otherwise I'm not sure you all would have believed me. I'm still not sure I believe it myself. I was hungry at the time, after all, so this may have been a mirage. Yeah, that's it. I made myself see candy coated goodness in her hair because it was time for my afternoon snack.

That's my story and I'm sticking to it.

And now for a musical selection...................................

YouTube Foolishness: Man in the Mirror Edition

I'm going to take a page out of this kid's book and up my affirmation game!

Now if you'll excuse me, I need to go find a mirror.

This one's on my list...............

to see next year. I'm usually not a fan of paying to see chick flicks. Most of the plots are too cutesy and predictable for my taste. More times than not, when I watch them online I usually find myself hitting the FF button or just stop watching altogether. Unless it's really funny. In case you all have never figured it out, the key to AR Gal's heart is laughter. Lots and lots and lots of laughter! For whatever reason, the trailer for this movie struck a chord with me. I think it has more to do with the cast than anything else (and it looks funny) so I will go with my first mind and plan to check it out. Lord willing.

Election 2010-You Decide

Candidate: Ladies Jordan High Heels

Are these cute? Y or N
Are these work appropriate? Y or N
Would you wear these? Y or N

Proposition BF Ugly- Should these be taken off the shelves, burned and barred from recreation ever? Y or N

Okay, so I know several of you guys read Creole's site. She had a HotMESS\NESS post recently that featured these shoes. Imagine my surprise when I actually saw a pair live and in living color this week being worn by someone at work.

AT WORK. AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAT WOOOOOOOOOOOOOOORRRRRRRRRRRRRRK.

To her defense, the dress code at our place of employment is fairly laid back but not so much that you won't get called out for trying to get away with wearing coochie cutters. Oh and she did. Not the she I'm talking about in this post....a different she. BUT, that's a another post for another day. The she I'm referencing is a temporary employee. Since we make a good chunk of $ during the holiday season, the organization brings in temps for the call center during the last quarter to help handle call volume.

I saw them as I was walking down to the break area on our floor but turned away when she caught me staring. I snuck another glance when she turned her head but quickly turned away again after I realized my mouth was wide open. #closeyamoufgirl!

This poll will close Nevuary 1st.

And now for a musical selection.....