YouTube Foolishness: SYTYCD Edition

I have been waiting for this clip of the So You Think You Can Dance Atlanta auditions to make it's way to youtube since I saw this last night. I fell the hell O-U-T when I saw this dude. No really, I fell out on my bed in a fit of laughter. Just like this |||||||||||||//////////////_____________

Fast forward to about the 1:40 minute mark. You will NOT be disappointed....and you might just get up to do a little 'p' popping yourself.

HYDRAULICS!!

Not much of this, not much of that

• I had a plethora of random stuff on my brain this morning. Now? I couldn’t tell you any of what I had to post about to save my life.

• That’s the story of my life. You’d think I have ‘mom brain’ the way I forget shit.

• I’m sitting at my desk tapping my fingers on the keyboard. This is sad yo!

• I’ll try this again later.

• Wait, I just remembered something.

• Watch Oprah tomorrow. The place that issues my paycheck will be featured on the show.

• Wait, something else. I just received an email from Tarjay telling me that my boots have been shipped! Hollaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa!!! I love that place!!

• After this, I'm done shopping for myself for awhile unless I see a sale on a good bra. You never can have too many of those!!

• And I’m gone!

Update...

....I just got the call. I didn't get the job. Bummer. :( Now I have to stay with Cruella DePhuckin' crazy just a little while longer until I'm able to find something else.

Onto plan b.................

Update on the update (text to Z)

Me: I didn't get the job
Z: I'm sorry baby.
Me: Yeah me too
Z: Well the positive thing is you are still employed.
Me: True
Z: And the post office is always hiring.
Me: I hope you choke on a chicken bone tonight. Love U!
Z: Lol, love u 2!

Scene on Scene

Here's a list of the crazy fragglenackle mess I saw @ Wal-Ma.rt while shopping today.

• A kid in the 10-11 year age range walking around with his shoes on the wrong feet. I was standing in the customer service line returning something when I saw him (and no he wasn't the least bit slow).
  
• The handi-cart mafia including a somewhat middle-aged couple, two old white haired ladies, and man that almost smashed me in between his cart and mine. It seemed like every aisle we turned on, there they were one behind another. It was the most annoying and hilarious sight.
• A lady with four kids: two in the big part of the shopping cart, one in the seat thingy (where the handle is) and one in her belly. I think my fallopian tubes and uterine walls just about dried the hell up seeing her.
• And the piece de resistance, a man in coochie cutters. Think Lt. Tom Dangle on Reno 911>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>
  

I'm going to start taking my camera with me.

Interview.............

...............job interview to be exact. I have one of those today in a couple of hours. I hate the wait and the actual interview process but I want this job SO bad. One because I'd get to travel overseas periodically (to Africa specifically) and two my current boss is about to drive me phuggin nuts!!!!! She seriously is not mentally equipped to manage people but that's a different story for a different day. I've prepped as much as possible but they always manage to ask me a couple of things I have no freakin' clue about. Here's hoping I can wing it.

So ya'll know I'm going to ask right? Tell me about your views on interviews. Do you like them/hate them? How do you prep (if at all)? Too bad my interview panel is an all women one, otherwise I may have tried something like that over there...just kidding...not really.

UPDATE: I'M DONE!!!! Now I can look forward to a (somewhat) relaxing remainder of the day with 'Glee' and 'Grey's Anatomy' tonight. I sure hope they don't come on at the same time.

Where the wild things are...................

Tell me why this thing decided to come out of the wood work directly AFTER mistah left for work???!!!

It's not the clearest picture but basically this, my dear people, is a fly on crack! This thing was HUGE!

Picture it, the morning of September 21, 2009. I'm walking around the house getting ready for work (but ass nekkid no less) and hear this buzzing sound. I duck (natural reaction) and listen. Soon enough I see it flying around and watch as it lands on the ceiling light fixture in the kitchen. I break out into my normal hoot and holler dance, run into the bedroom, slam the door, grab my robe and a pair of tennis shoes out of the closet. What?! I needed something on my feet that covered my toes that I could stomp (and kick) properly with.

Once 'clothed', I crept out of the bedroom into the kitchen and made sure it was still on the light. It was. YAY! I ran to laundry area where we keep the (bug) spray and then grabbed the broom. Shut up. Then................I sprayed with all my might. Buzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz. That sap sucker went CARAZY and flew everywhere. I'm screamin' and swingin', screamin' and swingin', AND screamin' and swingin'. It finally landed somewhere over by the kitchen window. I couldn't see exactly where because it was hiding behind a decorative bird cage thingamajig on the counter. I spray randomly and it goes flying around again. Screamin' and swingin' ensues. It lands on the other side of the kitchen and I spray again. It comes out, flies over under the stove, and I go in for the kill.


After inhaling the continuous fumes, it could finally take no more and crumbled in defeat to its death. Looks like another spray TKO!

If.........

...............a picture is worth a 1000 words, what is a picture of words worth?

I stopped by Sally's to pick up a few hair products and passed this sign on the way to checkout. I almost didn't take a picture, then I thought better of it and whipped out my trusty phone.

You would think they wouldn't have to put up a sign like this. Common sense,it just ain't that common..........apparently neither is book sense.

YouTube Foolishness: 9th Ward Edition

At least they are learning I suppose........

GLEE........

...............are you watching?

I am and am slowly falling in love with this show. Here's a 'video' of the Acafella's (an all male singing group comprised of teachers at the high school) performance last night. It's pretty craptastic (just sound and a still image) but it gives you an idea of what their working with.....the right mix of corniness and soul. lol

More to Love

So apparently I became a fan of this show without even realizing it. This surprised even me since I usually go for more of the sillier versions of reality dating shows (ie, Flava of Love, I Love NY, etc) although I haven't really tuned in to watch any of those types of shows lately. If you aren't familiar with this show, it's basically The Bachelor with folks that have well, more to love.

I tuned in every week (well not really but whose counting) to see which girl (or two or four) Luke would give the boot to. What?! Let's face it, that's the most exciting part and if you say it's not you're lying to yourself. I never really had a favorite during this process but always found that one lady stood out a little more (read: had the most common sense)than the rest. It is also my humble opinion that she was the most beautiful of the women in the competition.

So tonight was the finale with the remaining two contestants, Tali and Melissa. In the pic above, Tali (3rd from the left on the first row with the long dark hair) is Jewish with a good head on her shoulders. Melissa,the devil in the blue dress (the blond 2nd from the right), is Christian and a little flighty IMO. And she wasn't really devilish, I just could resist. So the ladies meet the fam and it's obvious that the difference in religion with Tali (she's from Israel and Jewish) was a concern for his folks who are 'devout' Christians (which really means they probably only go to church on Easter and Christmas but I digress). After the meet the family trip, surprise visit from his mom and an unnecessary additional 30 minutes for him to contemplate his decision they finally got to the end.

Sidenote: To those that watch, were you at all annoyed at how they zoomed in on that damn pizza at the pool hall when Luke and Melissa were on their date? They would have never tried that if weight was not a factor. I'm just sayin......

Tali won and Luke proposed. Three cheers for the happy couple. Now, let's just see how long this loving union lasts after the promo tour, Hanukkah and Christmas.

Reality love...ain't it grand?

Me either!

That's what I said when I viewed this secret on PostSecret (one of my most favoritist blogs!) If you're not in the know about it, it's over there >>>>>>>>>>>>> in my newly updated blogroll.


With the lotto FINALLY coming to AR at the end of this month (can I get an Amen?!), I'm one step closer to my plan of financial freedom. I've got my bills crisp and ready to hand over to any random gas station attendant so when they ask, where dem dollas at?, I can say RIGHT HERE!

One thing I've always said is if, NO WHEN (I must speak it into existence) I win I will request to remain anonymous. No need to have long lost cousins coming of the woodwork. Ya'll see how my g-aunts did their own sister so just imagine what their offspring would do. VICIOUS! Once the money is deposited into my bank account, I will chunk the deuces to my place of employment and make my way to my couch EXPEDITIOUSLY so that I can figure out the next move. I figure I'll set the kids in the family up nicely for college and what not, buy my mom a place outside of Memphis, give my sisters a lil' coin change to spend at the mall and of hook mistah up real nice.

What about you all? Would you want the world to know 'I'm rech beyatch!!' or would you keep it under wraps? What major purchases would you make? Would you give any to the fam?

For some strange reason, I'm getting the vibe that I've done a post similar to this before. Stranger things have happened so just humor me, k? Thanks.

Family Reunion and Roots........................

The reunion was pretty much everything I expected it to be. I got a chance to meet and reconnect with my extended family and recalled a few faces from my childhood. I still don't know them but at this point I at least know we are related so if I see them in the street I can speak. lol While there, most of the folks in charge of this reunion had an impromptu meeting to discuss when the next reunion would take place (next year or the year after). It was decided to have it in 2010 since the matriarch (and oldest living member) of our family is up there in age (about 95 or 96). It was even suggested to have something with her prior to next summer as my (2nd or 3rd) cousin so eloquently stated, when you get that old a year is equivalent to 5. LMAO I got my bluntness honestly. The gathering was actually supposed to be in her honor but her child that cares for her was unable to make it so the show went on just without her.

You may (or may not) be wondering why I haven't laid eyes on these folks in years. Let me lay a bit of foundation just so you'll know what's what. My great grandparents had a total of 10 kids, one boy (who died as a baby) and 9 girls that followed. My grandmother was the 3rd, no wait 4th born. She had only one child, my father, who passed away when my mom was carrying me. Got it? Cool. So, when she passed away her WILL stated that most everything went to the kids and some other things went to her sisters. Makes good sense right? Yeah to me too. Anyway, her sisters decided that what they did get was not enough so these batty heifers took us to court. Yeah you read that right....TO COURT.

Ain't that some shit for your ass?

I really don't know why they felt the need to go to such extremes especially since my grannie was not wealthy AT.ALL. Never mind yes I do, can you say GREED?? Now that I that I think about it, I recall them saying that they felt like they weren't appropriately compensated for all the help they provided to my grandmother during her illness (she had breast cancer).

Again I say, ain't that some shit for your ass???

I didn't realize that compensation was expected when you voluntarily helped one during an illness and on their deathbed. Especially when it's your own flesh and blood. Anyway, I can't recall all the details of the verdict but I do remember having to auction her house, the items in it and having to split the earnings with them. She had a lot of antique stuff too that would have gotten good money in this day and age. With the exception of my oldest sister, we were still school age. My mom was so outdone by the entire ordeal she just said fugg it and rolled with the (gut) punches. As you can imagine, our contact with them going forward was few and far in between....hence why I haven't seen them in forever in a day. My mom still kept in contact with them (primarily the remaining sister because she lived in the same town as us) but me for the most part.......ehhhhhhhhh no.

Now I figure that was the past, this is now and even if I never go to another reunion I still made an effort. Tell me why I just realized that we didn't get a t-shirt??!! WTH!!

YouTube Foolishness: AARP Edition

Death To Smoochy....................

This is what I discovered a little while ago while attempting to retrieve the mail. After screaming like a damn fool, a picture was taken, a foot race occurred, and a text was sent to Z with the following message:

There is a big ass dead lizard HANGING on the mailbox right underneath where the mail goes. The mail has been delivered but you will want to check it when you get home 'cause I ain't touchin that shit!!!

And I mean it. I ain't going back out there until that thing falls off or until someone makes a way for it to fall off. On a different note, is that not a messed up way to go out?! Blech!

A little bit of this, a little bit of that

My b-day weekend was fun!

Hung out with the girls Saturday… No one remembered to bring a camera. Oh well

The jury is still out on me and sushi. One kind I liked and the other was just well….nasty.

Ladynay, they didn’t have the brown rice sushi roll you recommended. :(

I’ll probably give it another go sometime in the (distant) future.

We then went down to another spot so we could, as my friend put it ‘really eat’. LMAO

FYI for anyone in the central AR area. The caribbean jerk and whiskey honey wings at Big Whiskey’s in the River Market are soooooooooooooooooo good!!!!

I got lots of calls on my b-day, cards, and cash (the people that love me really know my heart).

I got a new laptop for my b-day compliments of me and Z! He went half on an e-baby with me…awwwwwwwwwwwwww!

I didn’t get my cupcakes….boooooooooooooooooooooooooooo!!!!

I did however get an all chocolate cake…yaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaay!!!! We didn't eat it all. I brought the rest to work so these leeches could take care of that.

He said he couldn’t find any specifically how I requested. All chocolate (icing and all).

Translation: he waited until the last damn minute to try and get some.

We went out to eat and came home to chill out for the rest of the day.

Family reunion (on my dad’s side) is this weekend.

I haven’t seen most of these people in years (haven't met some of them at all) and honestly wouldn’t know them if I did.

I have vague memories of the last reunion I went to when I was about 6 or 7. It was in the country in MS somewhere. I think I had fun. Lol I was little so I’m sure I probably did.

I really don’t have any expectation other than getting to know the other side of my family a bit better. The only people we truly associated with are all dead now with the exception of my grandmother’s remaining living sister who now lives in TX with her kids.

I need to make sure I have something to sit under during the picnic. Side effect of lupus = little or no sunlight exposure. I feel like a vampire. They should cast me on ‘True Blood’.

I bet my mama is going to try and get me to take her down to the casino. I just may take her up on it. I’ll take my winnings in cash, no check please and thank you!

I’m sure I’ll be ready to go after a couple of hours. That’s about how long it usually takes my attention and $20 I take to dwindle down. WHAT? I am not going to hand over my all my hard earned money all willy nilly to those folks! If I win $50, I’m doing it big!!

I took yesterday and Friday off this week. 3 day work week beeshes!!!!

If only they could all be like that.

I made chicken alfredo last night and threw in some homemade pico de gallo that was gifted. OMG, it was soooooooooooo good!!!

I think I may just have to swallow my words and get a FB account. I KNOW!! Shocker!!! I do believe my mama has one and that just ain’t kosher to have her out doing me! I’ll let ya’ll know if I decide to take a walk on the wild side.

I still can't believe iniquitous 1 (aka Nikki Indigo) has passed away. Thoughts of her and her work have lingered on my mind since reading the news. I was mainly a lurker on her blog but the power of her words always left an impression with me.

Ok, this post has suddenly become too damn long. What the hell is going on with ya’ll?

HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO ME!!!

It's that time of year again folks....birthday time. It's not actually until 8/30 but I'm not guaranteed to feel like posting this then so ummmmm yeah........... The year between 31 and 32 flew by might fast! Oh who am I kidding, time has been passing me by since I graduated high school ('95 represent!). Thanks to my trusty sidekick lupus, this year has been the most kick ass and (mentally) challengingI've had in quite some time. I'm sure I'll have more to come but right now I'm just really thankful to have made it this far.

Still no definite plans for anything major but I will be going to dine on sushi (I'm a sirgin (sushi virgin)) and party with friends tomorrow. From what I've been told about the restaurant we are going to, I should definitely try the playboy roll, volcano, super white tuna, and yellowtail. What do you suggest? I'm also thinking about going to see Alex Ortiz, a comedian. Does anyone know anything about him? As in, is he funny? I'm not about wasting money....even if it is just $9! lol No tickets have been purchased so we'll see. Sunday it's all about me and my mane squeeze! I have been feening for cupcakes ever since I perused Barista's blog. Z has been informed of this and knows what he needs to do to satisfy my craving.

Anyhoo, that's all folks. Make it a great weekend. FYI....I accept all well wishes, gifts, cards, (paper or electronic), and payments via paypal.

By Jove, I think I've got it!!!

I think I FINALLY figured out why Sheree' (aka 'Who 'gone check me boo?!') on Real Housewives of ATL makes my stomach lurch.

She looks and acts like a younger, more melanin rich version of my boss! Her face, mannerisms, the whole package well minus the face wart but still..............

BLECH!

What Breakfast looks like...............

....well kind of. This is the end result of a tupperware container FULL of watermelon. I want another one!

Here's the thing...............

.................I've got lupus.

The facts:

• was just diagnosed two weeks ago
• it's incurable and genetic. My big sis reminded me that my paternal grandmother had it. I was only 11 when she passed away so I really don't remember much.
  
• my beautician found a spot on my scalp a few months back
• I tried OTC (over the counter) stuff but it didn't work
• Went to see a dermatologist
  
• He performed a biopsy. Translation, he cut the 'spot' out of my scalp so that it could be tested leaving me with a mini-crater in mah head!!
  
• It didn't really hurt but I felt him cutting. It's healing nicely. :)
• He thought it might be discoid lupus but based on the results of the biopsy and blood work it turned out to be systemic which is the really sucky kind.
• Here's a good explanation of all the types if you're interested.
  
• Went to see a rhuematologist (sp?)
  
• He did more blood work and had me do some weird 'exercises'.
• I have no symptoms other than this thing in mah head. Back up....I do have another alopecia type spot in my scalp but you can't see it.
• After visiting the Rhue and my PCP, it has been determined that (1) I am doing extremely well ...............so far and (2) it is not uncommon for one to have lupus and not have many of the common symptoms associated with it.
  
• No meds for me right now...only an emergency prescription for steroids should I experience a flare up.
• I challenged that method to both doc's but apparently the drugs most folks take while their lupus is active is not something you want to take while it's inactive (which mine is). According to them, the side effects could do more damage especially if nothing is happening...confusing right. Yeah for me too.
  
• Anyhow, my state could very well change at any minute.....here's hoping it stays this way
• Z has been AMAZING...I couldn't ask for a better support system during this time
• I still haven't told my mom. I was going to while she was here with the kids but I thought better of it. She was beat and I figured it would be better to wait when I go up to Memphis for the reunion so we can have some QUIET one on one time (hopefully).
• I haven't told my other sister either. I was thinking I could also just sit them all down together to have a big pow wow. As you can see I have not thought through the details all that well. :)
  

So that's the quick and clean version of my life for the past few months. I'm sure you all have noticed that I really don't get too deep and bogged down with 'heavy' (and personal) stuff on here. Posting this was actually a big step for me. I like to keep it light and upbeat and it will stay that way just maybe with an added update or two here and there about my status.

In better news, I bought these today from Target. They have them in black in the store and teal and gray online if you're interested.

Music in mah head........

I've got a reunion coming up in a few weeks in Memphis. I guess you can say I'm getting myself pumped up. lol

I miss the days when these songs first came out...*le sigh*






Bonus track just for S&G's (and because I haven't heard this song in soooooooo long!)