We Are One.............

This video made me cry this morning. Not from sadness but from pure JOY!!!!! I don't know this precious child's name but I love him as if he were part of my own family. Then again he is.....we're all related ya know. :)

Old school.......................

Did anyone use to roll their jeans up like this in junior high or high school?


Sidenote: It's 60 degrees outside today and way too hot (IMO) for these socks (they come up to my knees). I refuse to take them off and have my feet smell like pumpernickel though.

Let me holla at cha!

While perusing FB just now, I came across the most crazy sh*t one of my high school classmates posted. The name has been changed to protect the slightly touched.

Bk Williams holla at me
3 hours ago

Bk Williams wut up my nigg
about an hour ago



Just in case you missed that, he holla'd at himself. I can't....................

The Boob Tube

While scrolling through the tv guide thingamajig last night to find something to lull me to sleep, I came across the most random show listing on ABC:

I was a bit surprised to find such foolishness on this network. The show title alone sounds like a Fox, MTV, VH1, or BET production. BET would probably have an even worse show title like, "Don't Hate, Apprecia-Date". I better copyright that before Debra Lee steals my sh!t!

In any event, my curiosity peaked immediately as did my body so I sat up to get a good look. I didn't need to sit up to much. The show is truly nothing more than folks rolling down a conveyor belt in the hopes of being matched up with one of five people on a panel of sorts. After all on the panel have selected someone, they head out on dates (which through the magic of television seem to last all of about 1 minute). LOL At the end of each date, you knew who was a match and who was not. That's it.

Most of you all have been reading my blog long enough to know that I am a reality show whore. I'll try most any show out at least once. Honestly, this program is a total waste of space and I'm pretty sure I'll forget all about it come next week. However, I was entertained.....at least for this episode. I don't see this lasting much longer as it doesn't have the 'it' factor to become a hit reality show like "The Bachelor", "Survivor", "The Biggest Loser", etc., etc., etc, but if you need something to watch for S&G's. I suppose it will do for now.

Space Age Pimpin'

The phucknuttery has begun. I checked FB this morning and found this gem in my inbox:

whats going on miss lady, i c u r still looking good, by the way (insert my gov't name here), i all ways had a mad crush on you, for real, later



I haven't seen this dude in well over 10 years (and had no interest in him romantically whatsoever) so I really have nothing to say therefore I will not be replying. I've been down this road before. A response = an open invitation to mack. I ain't wit it!

As a special mention, please note the spelling of always as two words. I can't ................

A little bit of this, a little bit of that................

• Happy New Year!!
  
• I'm currently in a mild state of depression about having to go back to work tomorrow. Having been off for almost two and half straight weeks will do that to ya.
• I have enjoyed this time off like no other. Rest and relaxation are the best!
• I finally broke down and purchased a vacuum this weekend. I liked the reviews and the specs. So far so good. Of course it is brand new so we'll see how well it does after about 6 months or so. I'm just glad I no longer have to do extra work to clean the area rug in the den. Vacuuming is now a joy not a chore.
• Yeah right! LMAO
• While in STL, I got a chance to try out the restaurant Chipotle. I always hear such good things about the place that I told my sister that I just had to have some before I left. Let me just tell you, they had me at burrito bowl. The food was delicious! I think I now know my purpose in life. Campaign for a Chipotle in the Little Rock area.
• Too bad I wasn't the lucky SOB in Mayflower (AR) that has the winning 25 million dollar lotto ticket. I would open my own chain.......or make random trips to places that have Chipotle locations. LOL
  
• During this downtime, I've been catching up on Season 1 of 'True Blood'.
• I heart Lafayette!
• I also saw a few movies online including 'Precious' and 'Brothers'.
• I laughed at parts that weren't necessarily supposed to be funny watching 'Precious'. Specifically when Precious' mother chased her up the stairs after she kicked the house shoe back down the stairs at her. While I'm being honest, the movie didn't really leave me feeling depressed or down like others have commented in other reviews. It was just another movie to me, granted well acted, but just another movie.
  
• 'Brothers' was okay. It got a bit slow at times so I was thankful to be able to fast forward through those scenes.
  
• Z and I actually took in a movie at the theater. We went to see 'Avatar'. I don't feel like doing a review so I will say just go see it. It's great! We didn't do the 3D version though. Still contemplating it just for the experience.
  
• We took the Christmas decorations down New Year's day after coming back from Sam's Club only to discover they were closed. All we could do was laugh after wasting time driving up to North Little Rock. We really thought they would be open though. Womp womp.
  
• They really need to open one up where we live.
  
• I made fried cabbage after taking down the decorations. It was a recipe from my paternal grandmother. I'm not a big cabbage person (unless it's in coleslaw) but my sister made some when I was in STL. It smelled so good that I just had to try it. It was delish and so was my batch. :D
• My mother and I had a rather recent unpleasant conversation. Long story short, she sent me one of her notorious emails (these are emails she composes and sends to me or one of my sisters after she gets really pissed about something) after a conversation she had with one of my sisters. The topic? When I had taken off from work. She says I told her one thing and my sister another. I was therefore deemed dishonest and was called a liar.......via email.....over days I took off work from my job. *blank stare*
• I told them both the same thing. People forget and/or get facts confused but not once did that ever dawn on her. As I told her, if I am going to lie about something it would be about oh saaaaaaaaay robbing a bank or cheating the IRS. LOL
  
• In any event, all the facts have been sorted out (not that there was anything to actually sort) but I was truly offended and I told her as much. Now she's pissed because she feels like I put her in the middle of something. *rolls eyes* Please note that she put herself in the middle of a nonexistent situation and that she still doesn't get 'it'.
  
• I love that woman but she can drive me absolutely bat.shit.crazy.
• I called her Friday to wish her a Happy New Year. :)
  
• Anyhoo, it's really cold here as I'm sure it is over 80% of the country. We had the faintest of snow flurries earlier today. I'm hoping for some inclement weather overnight so I can stretch this vacay out one more day.
  
• Fingers crossed.

UPDATE: Soooooo, I got my wish. No work for me today! YAY!! I only wish I had found out before I got up out of my warm cozy bed, took a shower, and got dressed. LOL Oh well. I'm just glad it doesn't take much snow on the ground to shut stuff down around here.

Merry Christmas.......................

.......................from the folks in little town AR. I wish nothing but love and peace for you and yours this Christmas season.

xoxo,

AR Gal

AR Gal PSA

The end is near.....................................................















































.............................................................'cause I'm on Facebook beeches!!!!

I've been on for about a couple of months and just forgot to say something over here. If you wanna friend me, shoot me an email at yourluckychance@yahoo.com. Don't try and add me using that email addy cause you won't find me. :D Even though I'm now officially a FB'er, I still think FB IS THE DEBBIL! LOL

YouTube Foolishness: STD Prevention Edition

Which one do you want?

I'm..................

• ..................on week 1 of my two day work week extravaganza. Next week, it's just another Monday and Tuesday then I'm gone until the beginning of the year. YES!!
  
• ..................sitting at home on my couch watching 'Maury'.
• ..................wondering if this lady on the show has a glass eye. It looks peculiar.
  
• ..................not packing my suitcase to leave town tomorrow like I should be.
• ..................now wondering what I should pack. It shouldn't take too long to figure out. It's not like we will be going to the club. T-shirts and jeans should do the trick.
  
• ..................actually excited to see the kids and my sister. Not in a 'We're going to Disney World' sort of way but I'm ready to see them. My brother-in-law.....not so much.
• ..................often wonder why she chose him as her husband. He's an idiot....and ugly....like Dwayne Wayne but worse. I don't have to sleep with him though so whatev. LOL
  
• .................going to do better about volunteering my time in 2010. I've fallen off in a BIG way.
  
• .................debating when we should go up to Memphis. My sisters kids (the ones in Memphis not to be confused with the other kids I'm going to see tomorrow in STL) leave to go to their fathers house the day after Christmas so time is limited IF I want to get them their presents before the 25th. If not, I can always just leave them with their mom or drive to Pine Bluff to give them their stuff afterward. I hate PB. It stinks there. No it really stinks like Pepe LePew.
  
• ...............sure I'll figure it out at the last minute.
• ...............also debating if I should take my laptop or not. I'm leaning more towards not. I've still got my cell (and my sisters laptop) if I want to surf the web. :D
• ................hoping I don't forget to take the camera tomorrow. I guess that why I should be packing. I need to make a list because I already know I will forget something. Here's hoping it's not some draws.
• ................done Christmas shopping with exception of a gift for my mom and the kids up north. Guess that means I'm not really done.
  
• ...............actually really good at shopping for gifts for others. I just don't particularly like doing it.
• ...............still a little salty about the gift I initially received at our Dirty Santa function at work the other day. I purchased a couple of cute wrap scarves (only $8 for two) to gift. After it was all said and done I walked away with some homemade jelly. Ummmmm, that's nice and all but I only eat apple jelly (and SOMETIMES grape if I have to). I traded with someone (after the function) that actually likes the jelly and received the travel mug she won.
  
• .................going Dollar Tree on their asses next year for a gift. Fool me once........
• .................about to get off of here for a little while. I just remembered an errand I need to run.

Morris Chesnut's Roasting on an Open Fire

Nerd Girl posted about Christmas music yesterday and how she had to endure six hours straight one year. And not just any old music you hear on the radio. It was sung by people in musical choirs. LOL I can’t imagine. Now I do love it but I can only listen to so much for so long. I think a couple of hours of holiday musical cheer every few days (or weeks) is my limit. While I have limits, this song ALWAYS puts me in a good mood and makes me feel warm and toasty on the inside.

I got tired……………

.............of seeing that little lacefront baby every time I came to my blog so I’m posting a new entry. What about? I dunno. You tell me

Drop down low and sweep tha flo' wit it!

The mother of an infant daughter wearing her first lacefront wig writes: “It’s never too early for my baby to start looking glamorous like Beyonce!”
Mom said she had the wig custom made human hair to match her own lacefront. “I wouldn’t be caught dead without my lacefront and my baby won’t either!” she wrote.
But is that adhesive glue safe or gentle enough for the child’s baby hairs?





*fetched via email*

Oh well…………

I should have taken another day off but alas here I sit at my desk at work. Oh well.

The weekend was very much uneventful, with the exception of the comedy show, but peaceful. I have no complaints. I didn’t make it anywhere close to a Black Friday sale. I had intentions of going out to Tarjay to get a vacuum but my heart really wasn’t in it. It meaning getting up out of my cozy bed AND spending that much $$ for a home appliance. Again I say, oh well.

I did get a little shopping Saturday afternoon prior to lunch with some friends. FYI, Cantino Laredo has some of THE best salsa I have ever tasted in.my.life (the strawberry mojitos aren’t too shabby either). I pigged out so much on that that I barely ate my entrée.

I scooped up a cute yellow cardigan for my niece. I want to find a (cheap) little accessory for her as well. Too bad on don’t work on the west side of town anymore because I'm sure Accessory City has something in that HUGE store for her and me too. If boss lady wasn’t here today I surely would venture over to take a looksie. Hmmmmm, I guess this means I’ll have to actually shop for presents instead of just buying gift cards this year. Oh well.

I wish I would have remembered to charge my camera battery so I could have recorded Lavelle Crawford for ya’ll. Gary (Coleman Owen (I JUST realized, two days after this post, that I typed Coleman instead of Owen. LMAO)) and Bruce Bruce were super funny but Lavelle…..he's on some other sh*t! To hear him talk about McD’s and turkey smothered in strawberry preserves.....*smh* Ya’ll I laughed so hard that I cried the entire time he was on stage. My throat was even scratchy. Truth be told, I wouldn’t have been mad if he were the only comedian. If there is ever an opportunity for you to see him, don’t walk, RUN!!! You won’t regret it. Here’s a little bit of his routine I snatched from YouTube. He used a few of these jokes so I guess it was kind of like being there. :)

HAPPY THANKSGIVING!!!!!

Here's hoping that you are able to spend this holiday with the ones you love....or can at least somewhat stand while eating Thanksgiving dinner. Don't forget those to go plates!! :-)

And with that I will leave with you with a Thanksgiving joke and a little youtube foolishness.

Why did the Indian chief wear so many feathers?




To keep his wigwam.






Alright folks, I'll be back in two & two.....days that is.

A little bit of this…a little bit of that

• I’m ready for this holiday break as I’m sure most of the nation is. Well unless you have to work in retail on Black Friday.

• They should just do like I used to if I was on the schedule and call in sick.

• We are going to see Bruce Bruce this weekend. I was torn because Sommore will be in the Rock the following weekend. To decide, I listened to both of them on YouTube. I laughed at Bruce Bruce more. Plus Lavelle Crawford will be with him. Dude is HILARIOUS!!

• Z’s preference was Bruce Bruce. He says Sommore is too vulgar. Oh really Mr. Potty Mouth? Lol It is what it is dude.

• I wish Katt Williams would do another tour. I don’t care what anyone says, I love his press-n-curl midget-like behind.

• Jennifer Lopez’s new song is stupid. But not as stupid as that dance move she tried the other night. WTF were you thinking hey hoe?!

• I have to reconfigure our holiday travel plan during Christmas. I thought my mother would still be in STL with my sister. Turns out she’s leaving a couple weeks before and going back to Memphis. This throws a total wrench in my ‘kill two birds with one stone’ plan.

• Speaking of my mother, she’s got her dictator cap on telling folks (ie my sister and her husband) that they need to go ahead and get tubes tied, a vasectomy, whatever so that they don’t have anymore kids……in their house no less. And ain’t nobody asked her nothing! *gives my mama the side-eye supreme*

• In her opinion, they are too old to have anymore. I told her last night that she was WAY out of line for saying something like that. She got pissed. Whatever. I love her but she is TOTAL control freak.

• She needs a man or a hobby.

• I wasn’t going to make any dressing for Thanksgiving since it will be just the two of us but I’m craving it now. I shall be making a trip to the store to pick up the remaining ingredients I need (which I think is just celery).

• I need to thaw out my turkey leg for the greens tonight. Considering I couldn’t stand greens as a kid, mine taste pretty damn good.

• I’ve got a couple of better pictures of Ryan. The hospital has some sort of contract with this B.e.l..la B..a..b..y place that comes in to take portraits. They are really cute and different from the normal hospital photos you get but those sh!ts are expensive! I saved the page to get the pictures. Anyone have photoshop to get those words out of the way?

Pookie and 'Nem..............................

Imagine my surprise when I was hipped to this toy on the SEARS website.

This, my friends, is a Gangsta Baby Pookie Doll.

Yeah let that sink in for a minute. Oh and he's not alone! Pookie's got some boys to keep him company.

Gangsta Baby Benjino (who I affectionately refer to as Gangsta Chucky)

&

Gangsta Baby Rey Rey

Is this not some of this most atrocious mess???!!! When the hell did babies become gangstas? Whose kid do you know would want a doll like this? I'm sorry but I can't think of any. And don't you just LOVE how they threw the white doll in there? Yeah I've seen that Jedi mind trick before. It's that same 'I'm not a racist because I have black friends' mentality so we're going to throw the white doll in there so no one can pull the race card on us. I'm SO outdone by this coonery!

Lil' Wayne, I blame you for this.

Give it to me baby!!

Big sister numero uno is currently in labor with baby boy numero tres. I got word from my mom yesterday about the latest member of the AR Gal clan trying to enter into the world. So far, it's only labor pains (her water has yet to break). How long must one endure that torture before someone with common sense just breaks the sac to get it over with? I have no idea. Mother's fill me in and I'll be sure to call her doctor to tell him/her to get their job! At any rate, he should be here by the weekend.....I hope. Keep your fingers and toes crossed that mama and baby make it through safe and sound.

In somewhat related news, I am currently watching the show "I Didn't Know I Was Pregnant" on TLC. Two of the women conceived children while taking antibiotics and on birth control. Both were unaware that this 'dangerous' combination makes you more susceptible to pregnancy without a backup contraceptive. Ironically, both bundles of joy were plopped into a toilet as their mommies mistook them for constipation poops. I for one am glad that I was able to view these informative episodes and felt it was my duty as a woman to share this with others who, like myself, may not have known. Z has been informed that there will be NO sex in the champagne if I find myself in this predicament. Besides, if you're sick you shouldn't want to do it anyway....right? RIGHT!

UPDATE: My nephew Ryan Alexander was born 11/18/09 at 11:58 pm weighing in at 6 lbs. and ?? oz (I forgot what my mama said). Baby and mommy are doing great!

UPDATE ON THE UPDATE: Just talked to my sister. She delivered this child naturally (without the assistance of any drugs (totally her choice by the way)) and is already up and about to email pictures out. WTH? Now that she has delivered her last child, she is most excited about her upcoming journey of getting her flat stomach back. LOL

LAST UPDATE ON THE UPDATE 'CAUSE I'M TIRED OF UPDATING:

Rick James - Give It To Me Baby
Uploaded by stillhiphop.

HIGHLY GROSS: Food chronicles

Thanks to Gail (who NEVER stops by and comments) for the title inspiration and to a friend of a friend of a friend who swiped it from here for the post content. And to think, I actually like the Sweet Sue canned chicken dumplings. If I'm being honest here, I have two cans in the cupboard that I've been itching to chow down on. After this, not so much. Oh who am I kidding yes I am because they are yummy but this shit is still HIGHLY GROSS!!!

There she blows!

Okay folks so here she is. The video is not very long but I promise it won't take long for your mouths to drop open like mine did.

OMG................

............I feel like I need to post SOMETHING.

So I'm back from my visit and it was most uneventful....boring even. I always like visiting with my girls BUT I think I will be skipping next year. Someone mentioned going on a cruise instead....I'm down!

Anyhoo, I'll post more on my adventures later so I can tell ya'll (and hopefully show you too if I get the video uploaded) about the lady freak dancing a dude to 'It's the God in Me' by Mary Mary at the party. Why were they playing that song you ask? They were trying to get us to leave. FAIL! LMAO

Every once in awhile………..

………..some of this new fangled stuff the kids call music nowadays sneaks past my ear filter and gets the AR Gal stamp of approval. I’ve always said I’m a sucka for a good beat. The use of the Slick Rick hook doesn’t hurt either.



Anyway, that's it for me this week. I'm off to Nash'lanta *snickers*. I'll catch you crazy kids next week!

Ummmm, excuse you!

This year Halloween fell on a weekend and I was cooped up in the house pretty much all day with the exception of taking the pooches walking early in the morning. Around 5 o'clock that evening, I got antsy and had the urge to jump ship. I slapped on a pair of jeans, a white tee, a jacket and my sneaks and I was out tha do' yo! After reading a few blogs about knitting, I was inspired and decided my destination was Hobby Lobby. My mission, if I chose to accept it.....learn how to knit.

As I arrived in the store, I browsed other sections until I made my way over to where the knitting stuff was. I was sooooo ready and excited as I looked at all the pretty types, colors, and textures of yarn. And all the pretty types, colors, sizes of needles. And all the different types of 'how to' books. Then I got bored. *sigh* Reality sunk in and I realized this wasn't for me for right now. I still want to do it BUT I know me. I need to take a class. I need hands on help because me trying to interpret what was in those books and stay motivated on my own=KNITTING FAIL. Womp womp. So that was that and I headed off to a store where I knew I could make a positive impact on the economic crisis....TAR.GET BEESHES!! I'm happy to report I only walked out with an exercise DVD of The Firm. Have ya'll tried it? They thighs have never been so tight. Well yes they have but....never mind.

Anyway, so I'm headed home right? Right. As I turn down my street, I notice there are still quite a few people out getting free candy trick or treating some of who happen to be right in front of our driveway. Before I come to a halt, I hit the garage opener to give the folks a heads up that I'm trying to get in the driveway. You would think the combination of that, me sitting in the car in the street not moving, and the garage door going up would trigger something in their heads to move but nerp. There they stood and there I sat trying to be patient and understanding. I inch up a bit and do you know those country bumpkins still don't budge. Bump this!!

Me: *rolling down my window and screaming with extreme at-ti-tude* Ummmmmm, excuse me can you all MOVE! I'm trying to get in my driveway.

So they move, I pull in and then this happens.

Some random chick with kids: Ummmmmmm, excuse you!

Me: *thinking I know this bitch did NOT just try and get jiggy with me* Come again?

SRC: I said excuse you.

Me: Bitch I don't know who the hell you think you talking to but it would behoove you to shut the fuck up.

SRC: Well you didn't have to be so rude when asking us to move.

Me: You didn't have to take all day moving your ass. You saw me waiting in my car, you saw the garage door open. Did you think I was doing it for my health? What else did you want? An invitation??? Step the hell off.

And she did but damn. If she and her folks would have just moved in the first place all of that could have been avoided. Did I really have to cuss her out? Probably not but I did and I would do it all over again in a NY minute. After all that mess, I probably needed to knit...hell.

I'm over it now but a hoe had ya girl heated!!!! Anyway, since she decided to bring the hood out me, I will leave you all with a bit of musical accompaniment from the Ghetto Boys.

YouTube Foolishness: 5-0 Edition

It's sounds like video was altered a bit but I still heard quite a few misplaced words.

Thank You Nerd Girl!!!!

I knew it was coming. I was advised of when it was mailed BUT I was still surprised when I saw the package sitting on the table when I got home.

Thanks to Nerd Girl (and her giveaway), I was awarded some great gifts! Take a looksie.

From left to right, there is hand lotion (Sugar Plum scented that smells divine), a cute necklace and earring set, lilac nail polish (called It's So You), knee-high argyle socks, and dark purple nail polish (called Manic). What you may not be able to see is that everything is purple...even the tissue paper. How cute is that?! I love that my surprise had a theme. lol What Nerd Girl may not know is that I love, Love, LOVE those freakin' socks!!! I live in them during the winter months.

I've had the biggest smile on my face ever since I got home. Thanks Nerd Girl, you made my day! :D

An equation.................

Homecoming+liquor+visiting with old friends+late nights+hangovers=one sucky Monday

I need a nap STAT! I think I shall be venturing out to the car shortly...............

YouTube Non-Foolishness: Flu Shot Edition

Have ya'll heard about this lady? This story is so sad!



Woman Disabled by Flu Shot Reaction
Updated: Thursday, 15 Oct 2009, 6:12 PM EDT
Published : Tuesday, 13 Oct 2009, 11:27 PM EDT

• By CLAUDIA COFFEY/myfoxdc

WASHINGTON, D.C. - An Ashburn, Virginia woman is in the fight of her life after suffering a very rare side effect to the seasonal flu shot.
The vast majority of doctors say flu shots are safe. In this case, the FDA says they found nothing wrong with this particular batch, but sometimes there are complications.
That's apparently what happened to Desiree Jennings, and now her life will never be the same.
At 26 years old, Desiree Jennings was the picture of health. She's a Washington Redskins cheerleader and an avid runner. Her life changed forever on August 23 when she says she got a seasonal flu shot at a local grocery store.

"I was training for a half marathon then," said Jennings, crying. "It just all went so fast."

Ten days after receiving the shot, she came down with the flu. After that, her health spiraled downwards. She started passing out and had to be hospitalized twice.

"We went to an urgent care place and they wouldn't even let her get out of my truck because she was seizing in the back so bad, so they called an ambulance immediately," says her husband, Brendan Jennings.
Doctors at Fairfax Inova and Johns Hopkins diagnosed her with a rare neurological disorder called dystonia. They think it was caused by a severe reaction to the flu shot.
Desiree now has difficulty speaking, walking, and even eating. During an interview with FOX 5, she had several seizures. The effects are irreversible.
"The symptoms will get worse if I use my voice or walk when the brain signals are misfiring," says Jennings.
Desiree reported her health problems to the Food and Drug Administration (FDA) thinking there might have been something wrong with her vaccine. We also contacted the FDA and we were told they found no problems with the particular lot of flu vaccines that Desiree received, and the agency has not received any other reports of adverse effects from this lot.
Health experts stress that overall, extreme side effects are rare.
"The flu shot is safe for the majority of the public, and as I said before, your heart goes out to someone that experiences this sort of thing-- thinking that they are doing something great for their wellness and their general health, but it does happen in extremely rare cases," says Rachel Lynch with Fairfax Inove Health System.
For Desiree, she just happened to be one of those rare cases.
"I just don't want this to happen to anyone else," says Jennings.
Desiree and her husband plan to visit the Mayo Clinic in Arizona in November. They're hoping to get more answers about this disease and how they live with it.
Desiree has received flu shots before in 2007 and 2008.

Need Halloween Costume ideas?

The innernets have got you covered!


















via yahoo.com

Ogawa Rubber, Japan's top rubber mask maker unveils new masks that resembles the late King of Pop Michael Jackson, at their studio in Saitama city, suburban Tokyo in July 2009. Rubber of Jackson are among the most popular purchases by Americans eager to shake off the economic doldrums and go trick-or-treating on October 31, costume sellers say.

(AFP/File/Yoshikazu Tsuno)



Barackula

Whether you're republican or democrat, anyone can have fun with this fanged latex version of Barack Obama! "Barackula" will be available after October 10th, so pre-order now to make sure you get yours in time for Halloween! PRE-ORDER

Just in case you're interested, click pre-order.

YouTube Foolishness: SNL Edition

A friend just passed this along to me. I.am.in.tears!!!



She also passed along this little treasure. I love that my peeps know my sense of humor so well.

YouTube Foolishness: Crank Dat Edition

Somehow I don’t know if the Lord is glorified by this….

So how was it?

FREAKING FANTABULOUS!!!!

Ya'll, ya'll, ya'll *smh while smiling* this show was amazing! I highly recommend that if this tour is on the way to your area, try your best to go see Maxwell, Chrisette, and Common.

The show opened with Chrisette. I've been a fan since her "I Am" album was released in 2007. I've always like the sound and texture of her voice and last night she did not disappoint. Like a friend of mine said, it was like listening to the cd but better. She didn't get to sing as many of her songs as I would have liked but I understood since there were three performers.

During her performance there was a bit of a disturbance thanks to yours truly. Basically, I had us sitting in the wrong section even after making sure we got to the venue early. It's easy to mistake 113 for 112 right? *sigh*

Next up was Common (Z's fav performance of the night). Not only is he cute (not that I could see, more on that later) but dude really knows how to get a crowd HYPE!!! He did a mix of some of his songs (that I had completely forgotten about), this hip hop thing where he featured old school rap artists from the east and west coast, and a tribute of sorts to MJ. It was totally wicked yo! Dude even did a little break dancing and free-style. I'd totally hit that. *swoons*

We had to wait a bit (about 30 minutes or so) for Maxwell to come out and perform. During the intermission, I noticed that some point the people sitting to my right had all left their seats. I decided to take advantage of the fact that I wouldn't have to scoot past people and went to use the restroom. I guess I waited too late because as soon as I hovered over the toilet seat, guess what I heard?????? Yeeeeeeeeeeeep, the screams of elated fans as the house lights lowered. Son of b!$%^$!!!!!!!!!

Maxwell's performance was all that and a bag of chips(and dip)!!!! His voice, stage presence, background singers, band, stage gimmicks, and screen show were phenomenal! The big screens (which hadn't been used up until that point) moved around to form two big screens or split into four. One effect I really enjoyed was how he and band were made to look like a singing group in the 60's. This was due in part to their style of dress (tight tuxes for the men and a little short bob wig and off the shoulder dress for the lady) and of course whatever the sound stage engineer dude did.

The stage was also an added treat because it extended beyond the platform into an "X". This was neat because it allowed a good number of people to be close to the stage (I was not one of the lucky ones). Another cool thing was that the stage had built in holes in three spots that allowed him to appear and then disappear. It also had the ability to move members of the band from the main stage (like the drummer) out onto the extended portion.

There wasn't nearly enough time for him to cover all of his music but he did a good job of mixing the old with the new. "This Woman's Work" (or the crying man's song as Z calls it) was beautifully done and "Pretty Wings" was cool because feathers actually fell down into the audience on the floor. Some of his performances were rather open in content. He sang very vocally about sex....as in 'tonight I'm gonna make you my personal sushi' (or something like that). I instantly thought about some of the children I had seen earlier during intermissions and CTFU. Talk about an instant sex ed course.

The only downside to the evening was that the big screens were not used (in our arena anyway) prior to Maxwell's performance so unless you were on the floor ( or had really good eyesight) you couldn't see crap. Oh that and I don't have any pictures to share because I left my camera in the freakin' car! Womp, womp! :( It's just as well. I have pics and video from the Jill Scott concert last year and have yet to do anything with them. Oh, annnnd that I saw a lady walking around all dressed up with pink house shoes on. *blank ass stare* That was not really a down point just more of WTF moment of the evening.

Z: Maybe she has bad ankles or something
Me: So she chooses house shoes to wear....for support *side-eye*
Z: Hey, whatever works
Me: These country mf'ers refuse to let AR be great!
Z:What?
Me: Nothing.

All in all, we had a wonderful time and will definitely go to see this man perform again. He'll be in Memphis on the 20th...hmmmmmmmmmmmmmm. Here's a bit of the performance I picked up on youtube of him in NYC

YouTube Foolishness: Law Enforcement Edition

A little bit of this...a little bit of that

• Cochise decided to fuck shit up spice up our lives and take apart one set of his stitches leaving a gaping hole on his booty. *insert huge sigh and eyeroll* I told Z next time we won't have to worry about trying to scramble to the vet's office because baby boy and I will have an appointment with the Swingline.
  
• He now has one of those e-collars around his neck to keep him from getting back there. Here's hoping it works *fingers crossed*
• I truly could work from home everyday....or least 3 out of 5 days of the week. It creates a more peaceful less stressful work environment IMHO.
• They are giving out free flu shots at work. I don't want one. I haven't had one since I was a kid and have had no major problems. I'm not about to start now.
• Definitely don't want the H1N1 shot. I promise I think that stuff will have folks walking like folks in "The Dawn of the Dead" (google it).
• WTF is this 'Street Court' show? Now I'm a fan of reality court shows through and through but that is some bootleg mess if I've ever seen it. I don't believe court cases being handled on patio decks in peoples backyards and in front of churches is what the justice system is supposed to be about? Or is it...........either way that show is still stupid.
  
• I saw a bat sleeping on the wall outside of PetSmart. I took a picture with my cellphone but you really can't see much. I didn't want to get to close in case it decided to wake up and swoop in on my eyes or something.
  
• People really love my freakin' dog. He's so friendly that folks always want to come over and pet him.
• I made this last night. It was pretty tasty and perfect for the cooler weather we've been experiencing.
• I'm trying to keep up the trend of trying one new recipe/week. So far I'm on week two. I'm notorious for not sticking with stuff though so we'll see how long this last.
  
• Last week I used this recipe (both of them) from Barista. It was soooooooooooo good!
• I'm ready for the weekend. We are going to the Maxwell concert. Chrisette Michelle and Common are opening. I like her music but I don't much about Common's work outside of collabo's he's done with other artist. I hope I like it.
• I got my 'Race for the Cure' shirt in the mail yesterday. I don't think I'll be walking but I may take the pups to watch. I've never just sat and observed the experience. Observing may be best since I can no longer be in direct sunlight for long periods of time. Hmmmmmmmmm......
• After listening to a lady speak about lupus on a talk radio show I listen to, I'm pretty much convinced that I've had it for at least the past year (or longer). The things she described like back pain (like muscle spasms but worse) and knee inflammations are symptoms I experienced a lot of last year. The back pain was the worst! Sitting down at work was sometimes damn near unbearable but the doc just chalked it up to a muscle spasm and gave me some of that good good. It worked and that was that. Now I sit and wonder just how long has this silent life changer has been roaming around in this vessel I call my body.
• We were going to the state fair Friday night as we do each year when it begins but it looks like rain is on the horizon. Oh well, there's always next weekend I suppose.
  
• I'm tired. I've been going non-stop since five a.m. It's time for me to lay it down.
• We'll holla.........................
  

Furbaby down Code 10 Situation!

Look at my baby Cochise. Doesn't he look pitiful? Really he was just sleepy and probably pissed because I woke him up to take a picture with the craptastic camera on my phone last night. I wanted to get some pics of him prior to the surgery he had this morning. No worries, he's fine. He had to get some work done on his nether regions that was affecting him. Anal sac ruptures on dogs are not fun (or cheap) and that's all I have to say about that.

My baby LOVES the vet and all his staff (and they him) so much so he literally drug me to the door to get in there today. lol Cochise is really a loving dog that has never met a human enemy. Dogs on the other hand? Let's just say I think he can hold his own (and then some) based on previous experiences with some doggy disorderlies we've come across.

Anyway, just as he drug me into the vet's office today he led me to the door this afternoon when I picked him up. I think he's had enough of them for a bit. Too bad he has to go for a follow-up in a couple of weeks. Before we left, I had an interesting convo with one of the vet assistants.

VA: Do ya'll feed him vienna sausages?
In my head, I thought 'what the fuck kind of question is that?'
Me: No, neither of our dogs eat table food. (Now that I think about it that's a lie. We do feed them fruit sometimes)Why do you ask?
VA: Well, he's had gas all afternoon and that's what it kinda smelled like.
Me: Bwahahahahahahahaha Honey, welcome to our world. When it's bad, it's real bad.

Bless her heart.

Anyway, here's the gentle giant today back at home after surgery.

You'll notice his little bandage from the IV on his front right leg. He was and is still a little groggy from the anesthesia used this morning. He cried for his pappy like a sissy until he came home. Now? He's all up under him like the daddy's boy he is. I wish I would have recorded it so ya'll could have heard his punk ass. He sounded a pure-d mess! lol Poor baby.

I'm just glad he made it through safe and sound. Having had a dog die on the operating table before always makes it nerve wrecking for me anytime that they have to have procedures done.

Not to be outdone, Emma demanded a photo op all her own even though you see she's all up and through the one with Cochise above. Since she did not ask, here's a pic of her (ironically enough at the vet's office) after being told she needs to go on a diet. No pet snuggies for you little girl. Mama's buying you the DVD set of Richard Simmons Sweatin' to the Oldies for Christmas.

YouTube Foolishness: 3rd Ward Edition

I have seen this video before of the Notorious B.U.M. but it always sends me into fit of giggles. And is it just me or does it look like one of his teeth fly out of his mouth at the 10 second mark? I think he does about 3 songs but I only make it through the first one.

I throw my money on the flo'!

YouTube Foolishness: SYTYCD Edition

I have been waiting for this clip of the So You Think You Can Dance Atlanta auditions to make it's way to youtube since I saw this last night. I fell the hell O-U-T when I saw this dude. No really, I fell out on my bed in a fit of laughter. Just like this |||||||||||||//////////////_____________

Fast forward to about the 1:40 minute mark. You will NOT be disappointed....and you might just get up to do a little 'p' popping yourself.

HYDRAULICS!!

Not much of this, not much of that

• I had a plethora of random stuff on my brain this morning. Now? I couldn’t tell you any of what I had to post about to save my life.

• That’s the story of my life. You’d think I have ‘mom brain’ the way I forget shit.

• I’m sitting at my desk tapping my fingers on the keyboard. This is sad yo!

• I’ll try this again later.

• Wait, I just remembered something.

• Watch Oprah tomorrow. The place that issues my paycheck will be featured on the show.

• Wait, something else. I just received an email from Tarjay telling me that my boots have been shipped! Hollaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa!!! I love that place!!

• After this, I'm done shopping for myself for awhile unless I see a sale on a good bra. You never can have too many of those!!

• And I’m gone!

Update...

....I just got the call. I didn't get the job. Bummer. :( Now I have to stay with Cruella DePhuckin' crazy just a little while longer until I'm able to find something else.

Onto plan b.................

Update on the update (text to Z)

Me: I didn't get the job
Z: I'm sorry baby.
Me: Yeah me too
Z: Well the positive thing is you are still employed.
Me: True
Z: And the post office is always hiring.
Me: I hope you choke on a chicken bone tonight. Love U!
Z: Lol, love u 2!

Scene on Scene

Here's a list of the crazy fragglenackle mess I saw @ Wal-Ma.rt while shopping today.

• A kid in the 10-11 year age range walking around with his shoes on the wrong feet. I was standing in the customer service line returning something when I saw him (and no he wasn't the least bit slow).
  
• The handi-cart mafia including a somewhat middle-aged couple, two old white haired ladies, and man that almost smashed me in between his cart and mine. It seemed like every aisle we turned on, there they were one behind another. It was the most annoying and hilarious sight.
• A lady with four kids: two in the big part of the shopping cart, one in the seat thingy (where the handle is) and one in her belly. I think my fallopian tubes and uterine walls just about dried the hell up seeing her.
• And the piece de resistance, a man in coochie cutters. Think Lt. Tom Dangle on Reno 911>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>
  

I'm going to start taking my camera with me.

Interview.............

...............job interview to be exact. I have one of those today in a couple of hours. I hate the wait and the actual interview process but I want this job SO bad. One because I'd get to travel overseas periodically (to Africa specifically) and two my current boss is about to drive me phuggin nuts!!!!! She seriously is not mentally equipped to manage people but that's a different story for a different day. I've prepped as much as possible but they always manage to ask me a couple of things I have no freakin' clue about. Here's hoping I can wing it.

So ya'll know I'm going to ask right? Tell me about your views on interviews. Do you like them/hate them? How do you prep (if at all)? Too bad my interview panel is an all women one, otherwise I may have tried something like that over there...just kidding...not really.

UPDATE: I'M DONE!!!! Now I can look forward to a (somewhat) relaxing remainder of the day with 'Glee' and 'Grey's Anatomy' tonight. I sure hope they don't come on at the same time.

Where the wild things are...................

Tell me why this thing decided to come out of the wood work directly AFTER mistah left for work???!!!

It's not the clearest picture but basically this, my dear people, is a fly on crack! This thing was HUGE!

Picture it, the morning of September 21, 2009. I'm walking around the house getting ready for work (but ass nekkid no less) and hear this buzzing sound. I duck (natural reaction) and listen. Soon enough I see it flying around and watch as it lands on the ceiling light fixture in the kitchen. I break out into my normal hoot and holler dance, run into the bedroom, slam the door, grab my robe and a pair of tennis shoes out of the closet. What?! I needed something on my feet that covered my toes that I could stomp (and kick) properly with.

Once 'clothed', I crept out of the bedroom into the kitchen and made sure it was still on the light. It was. YAY! I ran to laundry area where we keep the (bug) spray and then grabbed the broom. Shut up. Then................I sprayed with all my might. Buzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz. That sap sucker went CARAZY and flew everywhere. I'm screamin' and swingin', screamin' and swingin', AND screamin' and swingin'. It finally landed somewhere over by the kitchen window. I couldn't see exactly where because it was hiding behind a decorative bird cage thingamajig on the counter. I spray randomly and it goes flying around again. Screamin' and swingin' ensues. It lands on the other side of the kitchen and I spray again. It comes out, flies over under the stove, and I go in for the kill.


After inhaling the continuous fumes, it could finally take no more and crumbled in defeat to its death. Looks like another spray TKO!

If.........

...............a picture is worth a 1000 words, what is a picture of words worth?

I stopped by Sally's to pick up a few hair products and passed this sign on the way to checkout. I almost didn't take a picture, then I thought better of it and whipped out my trusty phone.

You would think they wouldn't have to put up a sign like this. Common sense,it just ain't that common..........apparently neither is book sense.

YouTube Foolishness: 9th Ward Edition

At least they are learning I suppose........

GLEE........

...............are you watching?

I am and am slowly falling in love with this show. Here's a 'video' of the Acafella's (an all male singing group comprised of teachers at the high school) performance last night. It's pretty craptastic (just sound and a still image) but it gives you an idea of what their working with.....the right mix of corniness and soul. lol

More to Love

So apparently I became a fan of this show without even realizing it. This surprised even me since I usually go for more of the sillier versions of reality dating shows (ie, Flava of Love, I Love NY, etc) although I haven't really tuned in to watch any of those types of shows lately. If you aren't familiar with this show, it's basically The Bachelor with folks that have well, more to love.

I tuned in every week (well not really but whose counting) to see which girl (or two or four) Luke would give the boot to. What?! Let's face it, that's the most exciting part and if you say it's not you're lying to yourself. I never really had a favorite during this process but always found that one lady stood out a little more (read: had the most common sense)than the rest. It is also my humble opinion that she was the most beautiful of the women in the competition.

So tonight was the finale with the remaining two contestants, Tali and Melissa. In the pic above, Tali (3rd from the left on the first row with the long dark hair) is Jewish with a good head on her shoulders. Melissa,the devil in the blue dress (the blond 2nd from the right), is Christian and a little flighty IMO. And she wasn't really devilish, I just could resist. So the ladies meet the fam and it's obvious that the difference in religion with Tali (she's from Israel and Jewish) was a concern for his folks who are 'devout' Christians (which really means they probably only go to church on Easter and Christmas but I digress). After the meet the family trip, surprise visit from his mom and an unnecessary additional 30 minutes for him to contemplate his decision they finally got to the end.

Sidenote: To those that watch, were you at all annoyed at how they zoomed in on that damn pizza at the pool hall when Luke and Melissa were on their date? They would have never tried that if weight was not a factor. I'm just sayin......

Tali won and Luke proposed. Three cheers for the happy couple. Now, let's just see how long this loving union lasts after the promo tour, Hanukkah and Christmas.

Reality love...ain't it grand?

Me either!

That's what I said when I viewed this secret on PostSecret (one of my most favoritist blogs!) If you're not in the know about it, it's over there >>>>>>>>>>>>> in my newly updated blogroll.


With the lotto FINALLY coming to AR at the end of this month (can I get an Amen?!), I'm one step closer to my plan of financial freedom. I've got my bills crisp and ready to hand over to any random gas station attendant so when they ask, where dem dollas at?, I can say RIGHT HERE!

One thing I've always said is if, NO WHEN (I must speak it into existence) I win I will request to remain anonymous. No need to have long lost cousins coming of the woodwork. Ya'll see how my g-aunts did their own sister so just imagine what their offspring would do. VICIOUS! Once the money is deposited into my bank account, I will chunk the deuces to my place of employment and make my way to my couch EXPEDITIOUSLY so that I can figure out the next move. I figure I'll set the kids in the family up nicely for college and what not, buy my mom a place outside of Memphis, give my sisters a lil' coin change to spend at the mall and of hook mistah up real nice.

What about you all? Would you want the world to know 'I'm rech beyatch!!' or would you keep it under wraps? What major purchases would you make? Would you give any to the fam?

For some strange reason, I'm getting the vibe that I've done a post similar to this before. Stranger things have happened so just humor me, k? Thanks.